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Neumann Rea's avatar

Delightful letter, but I have to ask, is this by the late Brian Doyle? (He once wrote wonderfully about writing to some 500 other Brian Doyles around the U.S., so maybe it is I who am wrong in thinking of the writer who died in 2017.)

Shaun Usher's avatar

It seems you're correct. I had no idea he had died.

Neumann Rea's avatar

I twice had the pleasure of hearing Brian speak, talking with him once. Amazing person.

Dr Michael J Wagner's avatar

As an academic, Shawn, rejection letters are not unknown to me. One of my textbook manuscripts, when being passed around to publisher's committee members, was singled out by a snarky reviewer as "three standard deviations worse than anything that sword wielding, opinionated person had ever seen." It stung. Today that manuscript has been published by Kenndall/Hunt Publishing and is required reading on many campuses. I liked the one you shared. It does the same job - without giving any advice to the author.

Cate Salenger's avatar

If I'd gotten the rejection letter, I'd feel pretty special anyway for the time spent writing it.

Mark Barnette's avatar

Editing Portland Magazine is among the least of Brian Doyle's many literary accomplishments. Here is another that's worth your time -- and everybody else's too, probably.

https://theamericanscholar.org/joyas-volardores/

Wayne Cointelpro's avatar

But what about the parakeet? The suspense is killing me!

Aimee O's avatar

I would frame this one. It's spectacular! I visited the kurt Vonnegut museum in Indy. Some of his rejection letters are framed. I find the fact humorous.

Harrison's avatar

Love this! I’m Harrison, an ex fine dining industry line cook. My stack "The Secret Ingredient" adapts hit restaurant recipes (mostly NYC and L.A.) for easy home cooking. Dm me if interested in a recommendation swap — we’re growing fast!

check us out:

https://thesecretingredient.substack.com

HBD's avatar

I think that letter is contemptible. It makes mock of someone who submitted an article in good faith. It says “we do not take your submission seriously enough to even pretend that it is worthy of any consideration.” Gutless, unprofessional and ,as I said, contemptible.

Lorna French's avatar

As I read it I ‘re-read’ the various (upwards of 20 now) rejection letters I’d received and the worst by far are the total vacuum followed by the ACME and then perhaps the over-engineered: here are some things you should consider you dolt. So I think, at least if you got this you would feel it was a human to human interaction. And laugh.

Richard Ritenbaugh's avatar

With a life like this, one would likely be a bit neurotic.

Karen Cambareri's avatar

Brian Doyle’s Mink River is one of my favorite books.

Lisa Verlo's avatar

I must remember to submit something to the Portland Magazine in hopes of getting a personalized copy of this letter. So inspiring!